A Lunch Date
After today’s Convocation ended, I stood in a circle of about 10 different people. We talked, and then broke off in separate groups to walk to lunch, all knowing that we would sit together, though none feeling the need to say it out loud. I ended up walking with one other person, and found even attempting to make small talk felt painful. Usually conversation and playful banter come easily, but today, something was different. Company felt constricting. Confining. Condemning.
I needed to be alone.
I needed a lunch date.
Once we arrived at the Rot, the cafeteria style dining hall on campus, I broke away and left my friend to find the group on his own. I couldn’t sit and socialize. I was suffocating in my own, desperate need to be alone. To listen. I had someone I needed to meet with.
I went and found a little stool off to the side, all by myself. In a room that easily had over 1,000 people eating, I was able to sit, reach for my phone, pull up my Daily Bible app, and have lunch with my Savior.
I find it amazing, that God will meet us right where we are. Sure, I live on the campus of the world’s largest Christian University. But He isn’t just with us in large gatherings, in Convocation or Campus Church or alone in a dorm room while having quiet time. His omnipresence is undeniable.
In a busy, crowded, hectic cafeteria, I wasn’t lost in a sea of faces, and my silent prayers were not drowned out by the noise of clattering plates, chants, cheers, and crowds. I wasn’t overlooked for someone holier than I, or passed by for someone going through struggles much more challenging than my own.
He was there with me. Not because of who I am, but because who He created me to be, in Him.
I was reading the letter that Paul wrote, from jail, to the church at Ephesus. Begging them to live the way they were called, the way the were created.
I was reminded today to live out my calling. Not compromise it to fit what I think that I need, or to rationalize it to fit inside a box that makes sense to me.
While the Great Commission is not a choice, but rather a command for EVERY Christian, and loving God and loving people are the two greatest commandments, they far too often get lost in the everyday.
I’m tired of letting that happen. The cry for love from broken and hurting hearts that surrounded me were so overwhelming, I had to get away.
Loving is a decision. Obedience is a decision.
And I have decided to follow Jesus.
To love. To go to the broken, and to love.
I have decided to follow Jesus. No turning back.
No turning back.